• HILITE NEWS HAS BEEN NAMED A NATIONAL SCHOLASTIC PRESS ASSOCIATION ONLINE PACEMAKER FINALIST
  • HILITE NEWS HAS BEEN NAMED THE HOOSIER STAR WINNER FOR NEWS SITE
  • HILITE NEWS HAS BEEN NAMED A COLUMBIA SCHOLASTIC PRESS ASSOCIATION GOLD CROWN WINNER
Your source for CHS news

HiLite

Your source for CHS news

HiLite

Your source for CHS news

HiLite

College students returning home affect family dynamics

The Hayes family enjoys a family movie night. According to the Wall Street Journal, an increasing amount of young adults are moving back home due to economic reasons. MEGAN HAYES / SUBMITTED PHOTO
The Hayes family enjoys a family movie night. According to the Wall Street Journal, an increasing amount of young adults are moving back home due to economic reasons. MEGAN HAYES / SUBMITTED PHOTO

After her brother left for college, sophomore Megan Hayes began adjusting to being the only child at home. But shortly after, college student Ryan Hayes returned to live with the family again.

The Hayes family enjoys a family movie night. According to the Wall Street Journal, an increasing amount of young adults are moving back home due to economic reasons. MEGAN HAYES / SUBMITTED PHOTO
The Hayes family enjoys a family movie night. According to the Wall Street Journal, an increasing amount of young adults are moving back home due to economic reasons. MEGAN HAYES / SUBMITTED PHOTO

“It was kind of weird when he was gone, but it felt almost normal at the times because everyone who I know that has siblings in college told me how it was going to be like,” she said. “And when he came back, it was kind of strange because I was getting used to him being gone, and he was here again,” Megan said.

Although Ryan said he spoke about coming home for a while, his return still came as a surprise to the family.

“Initially, (my parents) and I thought Ryan would probably go off to college or get an apartment with a friend, but I think after realizing he wasn’t sure what he wanted to do, I think they were more accepting that he wanted to stay at home; maybe they didn’t expect it, but they understood why because they felt like it would be better if he would stay,” Megan said.

While the idea of having a sibling at home with her seemed strange to Megan, the number of students going off to college and then “boomeranging” back home has been on the rise since 2007. According to a March 2012 Pew Research Center study, the number of Americans living with multigenerational household families is at its highest since the 1950s and has been rising steadily since the 2007 recession, with 29 percent of young adults temporarily back home with their parents during the recession today. This new “Boomerang Generation” consists of young adults in their 20s or 30s who moved out of their parents’ homes after high school graduation, but returned during the economic recession. Those who live at home either have trouble finding a high-paying job, or cannot find a job at all.

Although sometimes it may seem sudden, Lila Torp, human development and family wellness teacher, said boomerang children who return home due to the struggling economy can be happy in their situation with parents who make an offer for them to live at home with them and are welcoming to them.

“If it’s because they have student loans, because they can’t get a job that pays enough, because they can’t get a job at all, I think parents tend to be a little more understanding of that,” Torp said.

Torp said while some boomerang kids have to live at home with their parents for a while, as a permanent solution, it is not always the healthiest choice.

Because of the heavy attention Megan’s parents give to her brother, Megan said she feels like the focus is being shifted away from her.

Sophomore Megan Hayes and her brother spend time talking to each other. Megan said that they have gotten closer since his graduation, because they spend more time together. SAM PATTERSON / PHOTO
Sophomore Megan Hayes and her brother spend time talking to each other. Megan said that they have gotten closer since his graduation, because they spend more time together. SAM PATTERSON / PHOTO

“When they’re helping Ryan find a job and looking for plans for college and how to pay for it, I feel like they’re not focusing as much on my plans and college visits and figuring out what I want to do and me getting a job because his need is more immediate,” Megan said. “Sometimes when (my parents) are so focused on my brother, it kind of feels like they’re not ignoring me, but that they are aren’t thinking about it and it’s a little annoying when I’m trying to find a job and I’m trying to figure this out.”

For issues in the family caused by the boomerang child, Torp said parents should sit their family down and discuss expectations to avoid conflicts.

“It goes back to communication,” Torp said. “They should discuss if they pay rent, is there going to be a time limit, (if there) are there going to some new rules established.”

From the boomerang child’s standpoint, Torp said, returning home was probably not the original goal, so he probably feels a disappointment that he is back at home. Although boomerang kids are grateful, she said, they have an opportunity safety net that can help them create a better relationship with the family.

For the most part, parents who have their children live back at home with them are able to provide further financial assistance. Seventy-two percent of boomerang kids who live back at home say parents’ financial situation has had a positive impact on their own financial situation and on the family.

“My dad was helping him look online, and they have been calling different places,” Megan said. “I think he would be more independent in that sense if he was away at college, but since he’s living with us they kind of help him (with) more stuff.”

Ryan said he has been trying to make money, find an apartment and move out of the house, but the economic backdrop for young adults during the recession has been bleak. The unemployment rate for workers from the age of 18 to 24 skyrocketed between 2007 and 2010 and came down slightly in 2011. Because of this, many have to settle for low-paying jobs they do not really want. Ryan currently works at O’Malia’s and is trying to go into business or advertising to help support the family.

The Hayes siblings play with their cat. Megan said there is a changed dynamic at the household because of her brother’s presence.
The Hayes siblings play with their cat. Megan said there is a changed dynamic at the household because of her brother’s presence. SAM PATTERSON / PHOTO

“I’m trying to get everything done by myself and everything I need on my own,” Ryan said. “After I graduate, I will move out and move in with my girlfriend.”

But despite the expected burden that comes with having a person back in the family, Megan said having her brother stay at home has actually made them closer.

“It’s actually kind of nice because if I need to go somewhere, he can take me, or we can hang out and do other things,” Megan said. “We’re closer than a family who doesn’t have (its college kid) at home. We’ve gotten a lot closer since he’s graduated from high school because I can spend more time with him since he has more time.”

Her brother’s presence at home again has taught Megan to look at her future earlier and plan ahead in life.

“This has kind of taught me that you need to plan and think about your future more when you’re in high school or when you’re younger because it creeps up on you,” she said.

Megan said although she loves having her brother back at home with her, she feels it would be better for him to find a better-paying job and live on his own because she hopes to move out once she graduates.

“I like him living at home because it’s really fun hanging out with him and seeing him, but I want it to be better for him financially to be on his own and to be more independent,” she said. “I’d rather him stay for personal reasons, but I think it would be better for him to move out.”

w.feature.grahpic

Leave a Comment
Donate to HiLite
$20
$500
Contributed
Our Goal

Comments (0)

All HiLite Picks Reader Picks Sort: Newest

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *