National Middle Child Day occurs on Aug. 12, and middle children are often stereotyped as neglected, forgotten and overshadowed by their siblings. However, junior Arya Goel said this stereotype does not correlate with her experience as a middle child at all. 

“Contrary to popular belief, I don’t think that I have ever felt neglected in my family,” Goel said. “That could be because I am the only daughter or since I have a large age gap between my older brother, but I would say it hasn’t impacted the relationships I have with my siblings or family.”

Goel said being a middle child allowed her to have different relationships with each of her siblings. 

“I have two brothers; one is 23 and the other is 15,” Goel said. “With my older brother, I can definitely compare myself and feel pressure to be successful like he is. However, with my little brother, I am more relaxed and I tend not to stress as much.”

Senior Nick Powell said he agreed with Goel and said being the middle child impacted his relationships with his siblings more than other family members. 

“I have two siblings, one is 21 and the other is 16,” Powell said. “It doesn’t matter so much anymore now that we’re older and can all relate to the same things, but my older brother used to talk to me more since I was older than Rob, and then I could talk to Rob more because I was closer to his age. It was a sort of bridge in the age gaps, although I’m way closer in age to Rob.”

Similar to Goel, Powell said the stereotypical middle child did not fit his experiences either. 

“The stereotype is that middle children are neglected and then want more attention,” Powell said. “I’ve never felt neglected in any way, but maybe my personality reflects something of an attention seeker. I’m not going to admit that because I don’t personally think so, but maybe Rob or Ben could gauge that better than me.”

Park McMillan, social studies teacher and head debate coach, is also a middle child. McMillan said although he never felt neglected, he did feel like sometimes he was in the background. 

“I have an older sister about four years older and a younger sister about two years younger so I was pretty much right in the middle,” McMillan said. “For me, some things were very stereotypical. I kind of had two moms in a way because my older sister definitely took on that mom role. I definitely wasn’t neglected; my parents did a good job of not doing that, but I definitely felt a shift when my younger sister came along. I kind of felt that natural middle child thing, kind of moving into the background a little bit, which was fine by me.”

McMillan said his experiences as a middle child has influenced who he is as a person. 

“[Being a middle child] has made me more balanced,” McMillan said. “From my experience, oldest children tend to feel pressured to feel responsible and mature and the youngest children can sometimes tend to get a lot more attention so they might think they’re the most important person in the room. Being a middle child has helped me to think about others a lot and to focus on others’ experiences and relate to a wider group of people just because I experienced both. My older sister [was] like a mom, being the responsible one, and my younger sister [was] the quiet but really good one, so I had the freedom to be more wild and crazy. I was the ‘bad kid’ in our family, but nothing terrible. I definitely felt it more growing up but I do think it’s had an influence on me now because I can relate to other middle children pretty well.”

Goel said she agreed with McMillan and has found benefits from being a middle child.

Goel said, “I think being a middle child has definitely helped me take risks and try new things without having the pressure of being the oldest or the security of being the youngest.”

However, Powell said his experiences as a middle child had minimal influence on his success and who he is as a person. 

“I feel like all of my success has just been self-motivated,” Powell said. “I’ve always wanted to push myself and learn more. Maybe seeing Ben get yelled at for being an idiot by my parents motivated me a bit more to work harder so I wouldn’t end up in the same position, but consciously I feel like I’ve just been successful because I want to be. [As for] my personality, again, I feel like I just am who I am just because I am, I don’t know that being the middle child affected that.”

Ultimately, McMillan said he encourages middle children who feel overshadowed by their siblings to communicate openly about their concerns. 

“Develop positive relationships with your siblings,” McMillan said. “That can be hard when you feel like you’re stuck in the middle and you’re getting it from both sides, but recognize the difficulties that being the oldest and youngest come with and focus on the positive aspects of being the middle child. Be intentional about relationships with parents too. I found it helpful when I was open and honest like ‘hey, I’ve been ignored on this and I have this issue that my siblings’ issues have overshadowed’; open and honest communication is key.”