“The Stepfather,” a remake of the 1987 cult horror film, is a tame and predictable thriller whose strict adherence to genre clichés drains the movie of any scares or entertainment value. It has the feel and quality of a cheesy B-movie, but not in a fun way. Its cast is mostly made up of semi-famous TV actors and features dialogue straight out of a daytime soap opera. The plot is interesting enough, if not very original, however, credit should be given to the original film’s writers, considering that this is just an extremely faithful adaptation of that film.

The opening scene instantly avoids adding any mystery by instantly letting the audience know that David Harris, the stepfather character (played adequately by Dylan Walsh) is a wanted serial killer who marries into families only to murder them if they don’t meet his expectations. After this, we watch as Harris charms his way into another family which single mother Susan and her troublemaking son, Michael, who’s fresh out of military school. From this point on, “The Stepfather” devolves into a tired pattern of scenes depicting the family slowly figuring out Harris isn’t exactly what he seems until all is finally revealed in the “big showdown.”

Originality is hard to come by these days, especially in the horror genre, but a suspense film should at least contain, well… suspense. If you’ve seen any movies like “Disturbia” where a seemingly nice guy turns out to be a raging psychopath then you can probably guess the entire sequence of events here by just watching the trailer.

Predictability can be forgiven, but the film’s real crime comes from its lack of thrills.

Walsh’s stepfather is played as either a genius killer or a raving lunatic. His performance isn’t necessarily a bad one, just uninteresting. You can only play a poorly written character so well. Also, it’s rather irritating when every seen featuring the villain has overly dramatic suspense music playing in the background, regardless of how mundane or inappropriate the situation. While the stepfather character may be at least tolerable, the others are far worse. Michael, the “rebellious teen,” is such a laughable stereotype that he’s impossible to take seriously.

The film’s plot is filled with holes and inconsistencies and it would be pointless to list them all, but there are some that are definitely worth noting. First of all, if one were to be a veteran serial killer, wouldn’t they be a lot better at avoiding careless mistakes? Especially ones that end up revealing their entire plan? The film’s biggest flaw is in the fact that its antagonist is so easily duped by his own victims. The family is on to him from almost day one, yet they don’t react until he happens to be chasing them around the house with a butcher knife. Unless you’ve never seen a movie even remotely similar to this, you’re intelligence will certainly be insulted.

This film is supposed to be for the MTV/high school crowd, but it’s hard to think that anyone over the age of twelve will find anything new or interesting in “The Stepfather.” For those who want a genuinely entertaining or even frightening experience, one would be hard pressed to find something worse. By Mitch Ringenberg <[email protected]>